2nd semester is coming to an and and i have a lot to say about it.
i am exhausted. i guess it started in the 1st semester where i had a few situations happen that were very difficult to deal with psychologically (i am still dealing with them), which caused me to be really behind on my college work. i was supposed to compensate this semester, but i was phisically and emotionally unable to.
this semester i also started my thesis, which was bad timing because i am definetly not in the right mindset to start it... and despite that, when my thesis advisor asked me if i was ok and ready to work, i said yes. he is someone i am terrified of disappointing and now i am on the verge of failing one of his classes.
i have tried to accept that what happened was not my fault and that, in fact, i do not deserve when people take advantage of me, but i struggle with that and i am still ashamed by all this.
i managed to pass my databases class, but i still struggled with my 0 energy to write my work reports. i'm planning on uploading the reports here but i am a little scared of uploading them. i will eventually, once i censor all identifiable information on them. during this summer, when i am over this year a lil bit more, i'll upload the rest of my work from past years as well. if you are looking forward to that, im sorry, just please be patient.
within the next month or so, i will have the chance to pass most of my classes through final exams, so i'm looking forward to that and i'll do my best even though i am terrified honestly.
now that we're over that... let's address this website.
i've been more active here - adding new pages such as the cleaning page and animal crossing page, working on a graphics page, and i also joined teeny towers and made a webgarden - because, for the past months, i really needed an outlet for my anxiety, and doing these kinds of projects really helps me channelling it into expressing myself and the things i love, or into creativity. so if you followed me thank you so much! i'd really encourage you to check out the community projects page! i am actually really proud of this one :)
i've seen so many amazing pages lately, especially yume nikki inspired sites. it's really cool, as someone who's loved the game since i fist played it back in 2007, that yume nikki still lives in the memories of so many people, even people much younger than me.
yume nikki meant a lot to me, especially after my 2nd play through years later, when i could understand much better what was going on (or speculate about it), and i nevet got over or forgot that. i am truly thankful to have experienced it, i don't think i'd be the person i am today otherwise.
anyway, my point is, curious timing for me finding all these yume nikki references everywhere...
these are bittersweet times. thank you for reading. have more interesting tales to come.